Upcoming Angelversary Blessings / Shaye Creamer ^i^Mack's Mom~Love U. (Angels in Heaven )Read >>
Upcoming Angelversary Blessings / Shaye Creamer ^i^Mack's Mom~Love U. (Angels in Heaven )
Keeping you forever in my heart thoughts and prayers. God Bless you! Love you Angel Anthony! Send your Mom some extra special signs/Blessings from Heaven this Angelversary! xo
It Hurts ~ By Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia Vaughn (Mama)Read >>
It Hurts ~ By Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia Vaughn (Mama)
It hurts that he's not with me It hurts that I'm not there It hurts to know it's years now... It's totally unfair
It hurts when I keep moving It hurts when I deny It hurts that I keep hiding... Each tear that I do cry
It hurts when it's his birthday It hurts on holidays It hurts so deep inside me.... Nothing takes the pain away
It hurts to look at pictures It hurts to look away It hurts when I seem happy This loss hurts everyday
It hurts when people notice It hurts when they do not It hurts when those around me... Imagine I've forgot
It hurts to miss his smile It hurts to miss his kiss It hurts that I can't hug him... This hurt can't be dismissed
It hurts because I love him It hurts because he's gone It hurts through every sunset... Right through the break of dawn
A Mother's Worst Nightmare ...By Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia Vaughn (Mama)
A mother's worst nightmare A mother's worst fear To live on without you Each day and each year
No words can express How my heart misses you Unless you have lived this You haven't a clue
Tears meet me each day There is heartache and pain Life is not living I'm physically drained
It doesn't get better Doesn't just go away We don't just move on As so many might say
I have heard all the answers From those that don't know They have said it is time I must simply let go
I pretend that I listen And sometimes I nod I continue to live life With mask and facade
No one can see it I hide it so well It's my little secret I have learned not to tell
The pain in my heart That I carry inside Will always be with me To never subside
Dearly Missed ~ Written by Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia (Mama)Read >>
Dearly Missed ~ Written by Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia (Mama)
Dearly Missed
Holiday season is reason enough... for more tears and heartache, it's terribly tough Harder than ever with holiday cheer One more day in another long year
I listen to songs that bring back memories See all the lights lit up on the trees It causes such sorrow when you are the one... without your sweet daughter or handsome young son
Looking for someone to make this wrong right Gazing at snow as it falls through the night Watching while others await Christmas Eve... knowing full well for your child you do grieve
No one remembers... nobody cares Maybe it's just that they're so unaware Pain that is present throughout all the year.... makes the holiday season harder to bear
Inside I am weeping... outside I just mask Missing and wishing while nobody asks Not one word is mentioned about my sweet child... so I keep trying to live in denial
Words that have cut right down to my soul Get over ... move on... your grief has control I know if they lived with this loss they would be... unfortunately able to understand me
So while I await the holiday with tears I will try to remember the wonderful years When the holiday had promise of sweet happiness Instead of the child I so dearly miss
I am so proud of you, and glad you decided to make a mem book. You will find it so much easier to cope this way, just put in the good stuff, like I did, you'll always remember him in that way.
Don't hurt yourself in going into detail sweetie, the other way will bring back the best of the best.Love to you and Tony.
Baby Boy ~ By Christine Ross / Sylvia Vaughn (Mama)Read >>
Baby Boy ~ By Christine Ross / Sylvia Vaughn (Mama)
My Sweet Tony , this poem brings back some wonderful memories of rocking you as a baby . How I wish I could rock you in my arms today . I love you !! Mama
BABY BOY
~ by Christine Ross in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001
Baby boy come to me, Come to me upon the wind. Baby boy touch my heart, Touch my heart and soul again.
Fly from where the angels dwell And fly into my dreams. Take me back to yesterday Before the morning gleams.
Let me rock you in my arms And sing to you a lullaby. Let me hold you baby boy Before you say goodbye.
Baby boy come to me, Come to me upon the wind. Baby boy touch my heart, Touch my heart and soul again.
Storms of Grief .....By Lyndie Sorenson / Sylvia Vaughn (Mother)
Winds are blowing fiercely Rain is pouring down Expect for it to happen Within me... not around
Thunderous emotions Waves slashing deep inside It is not the weather... Nor is it outside
Grief has taken me by storm A captive so to speak Tossed me all about Left me very weak
Strong winds will now prevail As the storm does pass on by With intermittent showers Till the day that I do die
In loving memory of Joey and his heavenly buddies Lyndie Sorenson April 2007 Close
I want you to try to imagine the worst thing in the world, that your beloved child died.. let me explain to you the reality…try to imagine, if you can, never seeing your child again, never hearing his laugh, never hearing the sound of their voice, never smelling the scent you have come to recognize as your child.. never hearing them say “I love you”…nothing - just silence, emptiness.. now imagine never seeing your child’s smile, never seeing him upset or happy, never watching him sleep…missing them so much that you are twisted up inside and the pain stays with you 24/7, you smell their pillow, their clothes, you look at his pictures and can only cry - what happened, why!?.. you have never felt longing like this in your life! longing to hear his voice, to see his face again,…and to know deep in your soul you cannot fix it. now imagine every single thing that used to give you joy and pleasure turns into hurt and despair overnight. not a gradual thing, but going from pleasure to hurt, from happiness to sadness, from peace to no peace, changing overnight. every thing you loved now hurts like hell…
For example: music, i used to love music, it gave me pleasure, i did’t realize how much music was a part of my life and how it is everywhere, now I cannot listen to it, it sears me like a red hot knife with the pain of losing my child, it cuts me wide open.. like the old song, the day the music died, that’s me, and believe it or not, almost every song reminds me of the void in my life without my child, i am not unique in that pain - if you lost a child you would know. .that is just one little example of how your life is affected by the loss of your child. Just ONE example! you feel the loss with every thought, every emotion, The loss bleeds into every aspect of your life. even with your other children, you still love your other children just as much as always, but as hard as it is, even they hurt you now, because when you see them you feel the LOSS, the loss of the child that died not being with their siblings. it doesn’t fit, there is a piece missing, your whole life doesn’t fit anymore. everything that felt right, now feels wrong. and of course there is always the missing, the horrible gut wrenching, out of your control missing…
As good parents we were always able to fix things or make things better for our children.. this we cannot fix, cannot make it better. so on top of everything else you are feeling, you also feel helpless..out of control and hopeless…and this is universal, every parent that truly loves their child will feel this. are you starting to imagine now how it feels? and you are doing this exercise for 10 minutes, imagine, really imagine, feeling this way 24/7 - day after day, month after month, and no matter what you are doing or who you are talking to, a tape of your child plays over and over in your mind. your child when he was a baby, a laughing happy little boy, a cute young teen, a wonderful young man or women and it always plays in your head and you do not want to forget even a single second of your beautiful child’s life…but that is a fear you have, that as time passes you will start to forget…so now, please add FEAR to the list of emotions. this is what it really feels like. a part of you has died, don’t just read the words, FEEL them - died, gone forever… a real, beautiful, living part of you has died… and you are still living, left behind to try to pick up the pieces of your shattered life and not having a clue where to even begin. No wonder a high percentage of marriages break up, parents have breakdowns, turn to alcohol, drugs or a destructive way of life. NO WONDER!!!!!
A part of you does not exist anymore and it is scary as hell.. that is why they say the loss of a child is like no other loss.. you cannot compare it to another loss, with other losses you grieve and you are of course sad, but when your child dies, a part of you ceases to exist, gone just like that, gone no warning, just gone. And the life that you knew, the things you always felt, the things in your life that made sense, that you held on to, that makes up who you are - are Gone!!!That is why when parents who have lost children hear “I want the old you back”, “it’s been a year (a month, 6 month-whatever), don’t you feel better yet?” “You are doing this to yourself, you’re making it harder on yourself”, “grief can become a selfish thing you know”, we can only shake our heads and feel sadness and hopelessness, because there is no way our lives will ever be like it was when our child was alive. No wonder bereaved parents isolate themselves, we are just trying to hold on. So were you able to imagine for 10 minutes what it must feel like? even 2 minutes is too long to imagine the unimaginable, to feel the pain, i would not wish it any anyone, but did you get a sense of how life-changing it is?
Imagine you feel this 24/7, not even getting a moments relief from it! now go on and put on your favorite CD to listen to, enjoy the music..go home and hug your child, listen to them laugh, watch her smile, smell the scent that you know is them and please do not tell me how I should feel or that i am holding onto this, or that my friends/family must be tired of watching me go through this, because if you haven’t lost a beloved child of yours, you haven’t got a clue. Now when you hear these words “the presence of his absence is everywhere”, will you finally understand?
Words are not enough / Tammie Sgaggero Mother Of Brandon (mother of angel friend )Read >>
Words are not enough / Tammie Sgaggero Mother Of Brandon (mother of angel friend )
Sylvia,
Words are not even thought up yet to describe the horror you have gone through in the event that happened to your son. The pain that you and your family will face in the future will be ongoing, I am sure. May God with his mercy soften the blow to your heart and your pain. May God inflict the justice so deserved by your son's killer while he is still alive to feel it. It's not enough, but it's a start.
I am so terribly sorry. Your angel is loved and not forgotten, ever.
Ask My Mom How She Is / Sylvia (Mother)
Ask My Mom How She Is
My Mom, she tells a lot of lies she never did before. From now until she dies, she'll tell a whole lot more. Ask my Mom how she is and because she can't explain, She will tell a little lie because she can't describe the pain. Ask my Mom how is she, She'll say "I'm alright." If that's the truth, then tell me, why does she cry each night? Ask my Mom how is she, she seems to cope so well. She didn't have a choice you see nor the strength to yell. Ask my Mom how she is, "I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping." For Gods sake Mom, just tell the truth just say your heart is broken. She'll love me all her life, I loved her all of mine. But if you ask her how is she she'll lie and say she's fine. I am here in Heaven. I cannot hug from here. If she lies to you don't listen, Hug her and hold her near. On the day we meet again, we'll smile and I'll be bold. I'll say, "You're lucky to get in here, Mom with all the lies you told!" -unknown Close
Five More Minutes From Compassionate Friends / Sylvia (Mother)Read >>
Five More Minutes From Compassionate Friends / Sylvia (Mother)
Five More Minutes
If I was given just five more minutes with you I would be sure that you always knew How much I really really loved you And I'd find out that you loved me too.
I would tell you I was always proud of everything you did We'd remises the fun times we shared The times you made me laugh We'd completely toss aside those times you made me mad.
I'd wrap my arms around you till our last second was up And although I would cry when you vanish from my sight I would be able to be happy for a little while Cause I would have finally got to say goodbye.
If I could just have five more minutes with you I would wish that five minutes could be a lifetime I'd watch you marry, have children, get old Instead, your beautiful life was just ended, ceased, cut short.
How can I tell you how much I miss you? How can I live without you voice, your love, your touch? How can we spend the rest of our lives missing what we lost? How can we breathe, exist, go on, without our only son?
Please someone, I really need just five more minutes with my son!
------------------------------------------------- Close
Valentines From The Past....author unknown / Sylvia (Mother)Read >>
Valentines From The Past....author unknown / Sylvia (Mother)
" A rose can say I love you, Orchids can enthrall; But a weed bouquet in a grubby fist, Oh my that says it all. "
Tony I remember well these little bouquets ...Love Mama Close
Thinking of You !! / Jessica Cruz
I am thinking of you today Sylvia and your Valentine Tony. I hope you have had a good day with a sign from Tony. Happy Valentine's Day !!! Close
Happy Valentine's Day my Tony / Sylvia Vaughn (Mother)Read >>
Happy Valentine's Day my Tony / Sylvia Vaughn (Mother)
A Dozen Roses
If I had a dozen roses I know just what I’d do I’d give each one a name that reminded me of you The first rose I’d name sunshine cause you brighten everyday The second would be beauty the kind that never goes away
The third one would be priceless like those hugs you gave to me I’d name the fourth rose silly oh how funny you could be Rose five of course is patience something you have helped me find The sixth rose I’d call memories the precious gift you left behind
The seventh and the eight rose would for sure be faith and grace Nine would be unique because no one can take your place The tenth rose well that’s easy I’d simply name it love Eleven I’d call angel I know you’re watching from above
I’d think about that twelfth rose and I'd really take my time After all these roses are for you my Valentine I’m sending them to heaven in every color that I know So number twelve I’ll name forever that’s how long I’ll love you so
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